a kettlebell training log, and
a launch pad for aberrant missives

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Not Martha Stewart

If you need to wrap a parcel for shipping, just cut up a brown paper bag.  Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.  It works.  This would also make you feel less bad about forgetting to bring your own shopping bag that one time and failing to get the 5-cent bag credit.

The box being re-used (and I insist on a hyphen here) once contained truffles from XOX, from a client, who, by virtue of having brung me said truffles, automatically upgraded himself to A-List status.  I had kept the box, which had been sitting around, until now, when proper etiquette dictates that I must return a watch that Mr. Army Ranger Dude from North Carolina had abandoned at the studio.  Men tend to leave their personal effects behind when they visit me.  But I don't blame them for being obedient.  As a rule of thumb, remove your watch before cleaning and pressing a kettlebell.  As a rule of the fourth digit, remove your ring because I don't like your jewelry scratching my kettlebell handles.  I don't have a rule for the middle finger.

What I don't get is why people keep forgetting their Sigg bottles.  Those things ain't cheap, and you buy them to be all eco and shit ... Perhaps Blue Bottle, not water, is what we all need more of.  Meanwhile, I can be the glorified version of the old Chinese lady digging through garbage for plastic bottles.  I will make a fortune re-selling the stuff that you people leave behind.  Mr. Army Ranger Dude got lucky this time because he's my muse for tonight.  However, I may not actually hit the post office until I see a comment below that says, "I shall not learn how to swing a kettlebell from watching YouTube videos."  

Posted via email from Mandarin Menace Lite

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I shall not learn how to swing a kettlebell from watching YouTube videos.